The Breakup

My love and I have separated for awhile. It’s been a week now and I’m feeling strong in my decision. Although we have a lot of really great times, the relationship was really just starting to drain me. I tried to stick it out, give it one last shot, but I’m just so tired of being let down again and again. Yes, Facebook, you and I are on a break.

Why you ask? Well, I’m tired of the constant comparisons. Tired of the lies. Either it was negativity constantly being thrown at me or eye rolling lies of omission. Partial stories trying to make me believe life is as perfect as a photoshopped picture when I know the reality is far less than pretty.

And if it wasn’t that it was the company that was kept. People I have tried to leave in the past are far too close for comfort. Because it doesn’t matter what friends I have kept, I’m subject to the scrutiny of their friends as well. The network is too big, too intertwined, too full of constant reminders of past hurts. Too full of drama. High school mentality. A written word on this forum is said without thought. Words that, if face to face, would never escape the lips.

Was I immune? Absolutely not. Friends should be chosen carefully because if you spend too much time with someone it’s all too easy to take on the less than favourable traits. I took on all the collective traits that bother me so much. I’m easily influenced. I was drawn in, sucked into the black hole. Time stands still. Poof it’s gone. Spent on what? Drama? Gossip? Definitely not enough on those that are most important.

Was it all bad? No. There are many things that I will miss. Inspirational stories, hilarious happenings, and a place to share my memories with those that I love. To be honest, most on my list are great people that I love. So I hope that by letting go of this bigger relationship, the real relationships will still hold strong.

Will I be gone for good? I can’t say for sure. I tried it once before and only escaped for a short time before I was back. But I can’t keep doing this dance any longer. This relationship can’t be the most important one in my life. In order to make room for the really important ones I think it needs the boot. I need to recharge. Get my head on straight. Spend time face to face with my little ones instead of my iPhone screen. Have real face to face coffee dates instead of screen time, couch and coffee dates. Stop thinking in Facebook status form. Make real memories instead of ones that just look good in a check in photograph.

So once again Facebook, I bid you adieu.

Leesa D just checked-in with her family. 😉